Making the World Safe, One Cheerleader at a Time
Monday, March 21, 2005
(SNN)Al Edwards, Houston area lawmaker, has introduced a bill into the Texas Legislature that would ban “sexually suggestive” dancing from the arsenal with which cheerleaders use to fire up audiences.
Rep. Al Edwards, D-Houston, would ban "sexually suggestive" performances by school dance teams
The bill filed by state Rep. Al Edwards, D-Houston, would ban "sexually suggestive" performances by school dance teams, drill teams and cheerleaders at athletic events or competitions. Edwards claims that he finds rump shaking especially distasteful. Also, the bill would introduce more reasonable standards in cheerleading uniforms. With the chest, midriff, legs, arms and head covered, cheerleaders would no longer be seen as a sex object.
Rep. Edwards is especially surprised that their peers approve of cheerleaders dancing suggestively and scantily clad. "I don't think that children should think that they can do these sexually oriented types of marches or dances," Edwards said Friday. "And that's when they get the most cheering from all the young people in the stands.” Edwards stated he thought that many teenage cheerleaders received too much lenience at home. In the spirit of fairness, Edwards offered to firmly discipline any cheerleader that would “come round to [his] place”.
Edwards stated he thought that many teenage cheerleaders received too much lenience at home.
In addition to closely viewing the suggestive dances of cheerleaders and majorettes at sporting events, Edwards has watched Debbie Does Dallas: The Revenge, Cheerleader Diaries 2, Lesbian Cheerleader Squad 2, Valley Cheerleader Sorority 2, Ripe Cherry Cheerleaders, and Black Cheerleader Search 39, multiple times. After watching countless hours of cheerleader smut, Edwards stands firm in his message, "Let's not have our young girls being exploited this way in our school districts."
In 1995, Al Edwards proposed legislation that would change his legal determination from “human” to “turnip”. In 1989, he proposed allowing the state to amputate the fingers of drug dealers. In 1991, he introduced a bill calling for a statewide vote on allowing corporal punishment of inmates in state prisons, saying that disciplinary measures such as flogging would help rehabilitate prisoners. After the research that he did for this bill, Edwards may be one of the world's foremost experts in flogging.
Editor’s Note:
Thanks to Whymrhymer, who first broke this important story.
: 7:43 PM : 8:28 PM
