NewsBlog 5000
The finger on the invisible hand
 

“Nuclear Option” Renamed

Monday, May 16, 2005

(SNN Washington)Recently, Senate Republicans have tried to recast the term “Nuclear Option” as a Democratic term. For some reason, they do not want their plans for the United States government to be associated with causing catastrophic loss of life from nuclear fire, radiation poisoning and a race of fleshy headed mutants that would follow.

Causing catastrophic loss of life from nuclear fire, radiation poisoning and a race of mutants

The term “Nuclear Option” was coined by Senator Trent Lott two years ago, and has been used heavily by Republicans up until a few months ago. While the Republicans tried to press the term Constitutional Option for awhile, the term “Nuclear Option” has stuck. However, the Republicans have won a key battle in making sure that “Nuclear Option” must always be referred to in “Quotation Marks”. Some have even gone as far as to make little quotation mark movements with their fingers as they refer to the “Nuclear Option”.

The term “Nuclear Option” was coined by Senator Trent Lott

As predicted, “Nuclear Option” negotiations between Bill Frist (R-TX) and Harry Reid (D-NV) have broken down. And now it looks like the very unpopular legislation may get a vote in the Senate. However, there is still a chance that a confrontation can be avoided, if a bipartisan group of senators, led by Sens. John McCain (R-AZ) and Ben Nelson (D-NE), finds support for a compromise.

Meanwhile in an attempt to come up with a catchier name than “Nuclear Option”, Republicans are attempting to rename the “Nuclear Option” again. This time they have dubbed it the “Making America Safe and Protecting Our Children while Saving the Life of a Puppy Option” or MASAPOCWSTLOAPO, pronounced “Mesa Pock West Lope Oh”.