NewsBlog 5000
The finger on the invisible hand
 

Editor's Note: Obey

Saturday, April 15, 2006

This week has found turmoil as six retired generals have asked for the resignation of Donald Rumsfeld. This not only disheartens the troops, but it goes against the weight of human history. It is the job of generals to Obey their leaders.

What these generals don't understand is that George Bush is a rich man, and Dick Cheney even more so. It is the right of rich people to do anything they want to the poor (which, by comparison, is just about everyone else). Throughout human history, it has been well established that the rich should rule over the poor and do whatever they want with them. Historically rich people have shown their God-given superiority over the poor by using them as furniture, ask them to die in wars, or in extreme cases, ask them to chew their food.

This brings us to another god given leader very similar to our own George Bush, King Charles II of Spain. Much like George Bush, he got into government because that was what a parent did. Charles II was the descendent of one of Europe's greatest ruling families, the Hapsburgs. Unfortunately, he was so disfigured from generations of inbreeding that someone else had to chew his food.

Yes, much like our own President, Charles II was severely physically and mentally disabled. And again like George, the only reason he was considered a man at all was that he enjoyed shooting. Did people starve under Charles II? Yes. Where people unfairly imprisoned and tortured under Charles II? Yes. But those things aren't important. What was important is that God made him the ruler of Spain, just as he has made George W. Bush leader of the United States.

History shows us that if we loyally follow the President the worst thing we have to worry about is ceding a little bit of land to Portugal. Oh, and his reign ended with a major war of succession, but that is just because he promised the throne to both his brother and an Austrian. So until God decides he was wrong, and he never is, George Bush will be our leader, and it is up to us to Obey.

Dr. Ryan Maynard, Editor, NewsBlog 5000


Complaints:
Ah, the return of the Imperial Presidency. Nixon and his Windsor-castle-like guard uniforms, Nancy and her china, Bush and his cabinet. Assholes, all of them.
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link