NewsBlog 5000
The finger on the invisible hand
 

Scooter Libby Falls on Sword

Friday, October 28, 2005

(SNN Washington) Today, the Chief of Staff to Dick Cheney, Lewis "Scooter" Libby, was indicted on five counts. Shortly thereafter, Libby died by falling on his own sword.

Libby was charged with lying to FBI agents and to the grand jury

Libby was charged with lying to FBI agents and to the grand jury about two conversations with reporters. According to the indictment, Libby testified that he heard Plame's name from Tim Russert, when he had actually heard the name from a CIA official.

Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald said that the obstruction of justice charges should be taken seriously. "This is a very serious matter," Fitzgerald said. In addition to the charges against Libby, Fitzgerald indicated that investigations would continue. "Given national security was at stake, it was especially important that we find out accurate facts."

Someone named Scooter should not be allowed to handle sharp objects.

Normally, someone named Scooter should not be allowed to handle sharp objects. However, Libby had ordered the sword off of eBay, thinking that it was a theatrical prop. The top aide was planning to use the sword as part of a pirate costume, so that he could more appropriately worship the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

In a statement, Vice President Cheney said that he accepted the loss of Libby "with deep regret". "Scooter Libby is one of the most capable and talented individuals I have ever known," the statement said.

It is, as yet, unknown, how Scooter managed to stab himself to death.


Complaints:
If only.
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link