Destruction of Local Radio Shack Predicted
Sunday, January 15, 2006
(SNN Burnaby) A Radio Shack in Southwestern Canada has been plagued by paranormal activity. Many locals believe that the store events are a sign of the end.
Some employees have heard the pedometer chanting the Lord's Prayer backwards.
The Radio Shack looks like any others. There are PCs. There are radios. There are unidentifiable cables and electronic devices. But this retail outlet has something that all the other stores do not. "The talking pedometer is possessed," says an attractive, young employee. "Every few days or so, the tinny, lurching female voice announcing how many steps this stationary pedometer has taken, and echoes through the store I work at. It stops immediately when I walk around the corner to shut it off."
Other employees have also had run-ins with the talking pedometer. Some employees have heard the pedometer chanting the Lord's Prayer backwards. The pedometer told a regional manager that it would take him to hell. And once the pedometer held a ten minute conversation with an employee on why selling $30 USB cables is evil.
selling $30 USB cables is evil.
This is just the latest in a long string of events. Recently, a dual headed display computer arrived at the store, but they did not order one and no one has been able to figure out who sent it. Last summer, Vatican and Sprint officials were called in to investigate the PCS guy cardboard standup that was crying blood. Vatican officials have yet to comment on the incident. While the cardboard man is gone now, the feeling of doom and bloodstained carpet remains.
Some believe that the events are a mixture of coincidence and hoax. While many believe the events are localized, others believe that these events may have repercussions for the entire chain, a sort of Radio Shack seven seals. Until then, if you are in a Radio Shack in Southwestern Canada, and a pedometer starts talking to you, you may want to consider a hasty exit.