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The finger on the invisible hand

Christian Profiles

Monday, March 14, 2005

This guest column is provided to us by Dale Carnast, Director of Religious Studies at Boston Harbor University.

We hear more and more everyday about more people coming to understand that their purpose in life is to serve Christ. But who are these people brought fresh to the lord? This article profiles three people who have seen Christ’s hand in remaking their lives for the better.

All Day I Dream About Sacrament

On Saturday, Brian Welsh was baptized in the Jordan River. Welsh wore a white robe and sported a messianic beard for the festivities. Brian is currently residing in Israel, where he began working on solo material to be released under the moniker Head.

"Korn has parted ways with guitarist Brian 'Head' Welch, who has chosen Jesus Christ as his savior, and will be dedicating his musical pursuits to that end," a statement from the band reads. "Korn respects Brian's wishes, and hopes he finds the happiness he's searching for."

Brian says that God speaks to him though his songs, and that God has given him a personal message for 50 Cent. "The Big Guy speaks through me a lot when I write, and I have a song for 50 Cent I wrote in the Holy Land. I feel like it's a personal letter to 50 from God, so I'm going to give it to him personally and see what his reaction is." Welch said he doesn't fear retribution from 50; rather, he feels protected by the fact that he's merely acting as an emissary between God and the former Curtis Jackson.

It is unknown who Head will pick to save next, but the smart money is that if he succeeds with 50 Cent, he will set his sights on Dr. Dre.

Colorado Railroading

When you think of a fired Colorado University professor, who do you think of? Most probably you think of the American Hating, Long Haired, Fake American Indian, Moammar Gadhafi loving, and art stealing Ward Churchill. But what about another professor named Paul Mitchell, who is only guilty of trying to do the Lord’s work?

Paul Mitchell is an award winning instructor. He is very popular with his students, but something about his teaching style angers the history department of Colorado University. One of the books he uses to teach is a Christian Book.

Mitchell has been informed that like other department professors ready for renewal, his term contract will only be renewed for one year, instead of the customary three. He instantly knew that he was being persecuted for being Christian. As a conservative, and even worse, an evangelical Christian and a popular bad guy on the Eastenders, Mitchell wondered how he lasted for twenty years on the CU campus. Mitchell has no recourse because, unlike Churchill, he has no tenure and is not really being fired. Also unlike Churchill, when Mitchell was notified of his situation, there was no protest or public outcry.

But Mitchell knows the real reason why he was fired. He recently admitted to the Lord in prayer that he was discouraged because neither CU nor the history department seemed to appreciate his efforts, and that he expected that he would be fired. And Mitchell says he can see God's hand in the situation. "I don't believe that my firing and the Ward Churchill fiasco happened at the same time by accident," Mitchell says. "I believe that God put those together."

Mitchell adamantly denies proselytizing. When he leaves CU, Mitchell hopes to find a teaching job at a college where his version of history will be more accepted. "My life is in the Lord's hands, and I am His to use as He wishes." Also, it has been announced that his character will be returning to the Eastenders in early Spring after being set up for an armed heist by arch enemy Den Watts.

Gunman Wants to Help Others

Courthouse shooting suspect Brian Nichols should make his first appearance before a judge on Tuesday. Nichols will likely face multiple homicide charges in the deaths of a Superior Court judge, a court reporter, a sheriff's deputy and a U.S. Immigration officer, as well as assault charges.

Early Sunday Morning, Nichols took a woman hostage. The woman Ashley Smith read to Nichols from the book ‘A Purpose Driven Life’, which had been recommended to her by her pastor. Ashley said that the alleged rapist and killer was not a bad person.

After Ashley Smith spoke about God and read aloud from the book for 7 hours, Nichols was ready to turn himself in. When Smith asked him what he thought his life’s mission was, he said he wanted to help others, “I think (my life’s work is) to talk to people and tell them about you.”

Another cynical journalistic turd shat upon our heads by yet another person jealous of not being sure in who he is. Theologically, this the concept of this piece is unsound, and only gives itself "credibility" because the writer qualifies himself as faculty of some educational facility. Last I checked, Boston Harbor University was the nickname of the Boston Harbor State Penial Facility. Ok, maybe you got your degree behind bars and this Ryan Maynard is giving you an undue voice.

Don't believe the bullshit.
By "upon our heads" I assume you are speaking for the entire Christian community, including Misters Welsh, Mitchell and Nichols, whose profiles are listed here? Or perhaps, you believe Welsh, Mitchell and Nichols not good enough to be your "kind" of Christian. And is the best you can do to argue your elusive point is to attack the credentials of Prof. Carnast and his institution? Despite your shoddy argument and petty attacks you believe you are a worthwhile judge to call Prof. Carnast’s column “bullshit”? I am sure the good professor will feel humbled by your wit and wisdom.
Another slippery liberal caught. Oohoo! Inmate Carnast knows what I am talking about, even if he is truly a professor of an "educational" institution, he knows that I am right in what I a talking about. Using "people" that call themselves "christians" to roil against "chistianity" is an attack against a strawman. Why doesn't he just attack Jesus Christ, for glod's sake!!! Something like, my hamster died of gerbil plague when I was five years old, why did Jesus allow that to happen?!

I don't I'm right, but you should still not believe the bullshit Mr. Maynard or anyone else reading this. No, find your own answers, not candy coated fuzzy attacks against the foundations of reality.

I am still trying to grasp the reason for your animosity toward Prof. Carnast, who merely is trying to spread some positive publicity for the Christian faith.
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