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Linux Powered Robot Goes on Sale

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

(SNN Tsukuba) On Friday, one hundred powered humanoid robots, running the Linux operating system, will go on sale in Japan. The robot, Wakamuru is meant to be a pleasant companion offering a wide range of services.

This robot will be different

Mitsubishi says that it tried to create a robot that could sustain a meaningful relationship with human beings. The robot can initiate conversation, and deliver such services as alarm, internet, news, weather, and email dictation. Of course, due to its Japanese release, owners will try to mainly have sex with it.

Wakamuru is meant to be a pleasant companion offering a wide range of services.

But this robot will be different for one reason. Because of the non proprietary nature of the Linux operating system, it will be able to have sex with many different partners. Eventually, the immorality of the non stop human robot orgy will open up holes in the fabric of reality. Then, tentacled monsters will come from other dimensions to rape women and eat men until either they are sated, or they are banished back to their dimension by a virginal teenage girl with a pure heart and a magic wand.

It can only be hoped that the programmers of Wakamuru and the robots that come after will have made them nymphomaniacs, or they have developed some sort of robot chastity belt. Otherwise we are doomed to a robot revolt within the next 40 years.


Complaints:
I'm sort of disappointed and surprised that the topic of numphomania has arisen. It is a common male fantasy. I don't know why men have such a fantasy because, in reality, they are limited to the number of times they can ejaculate. I think it's sort of like those two pound hamburgers -- Sounds like a challenge but in reality, they're seldom up to it.
 
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