NewsBlog 5000
The finger on the invisible hand

Editor’s Note: Obama vows to end tax cuts for the rich

Monday, May 14, 2007

Barack Obama (who my spellcheck assures me should be named “Barracks Osama”) said yesterday that if elected president, he would seek to repeal President Bush’s tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans and use the money for health care.

I don’t think Mr. Obama understands how bad off the rich would be without government assistance. Seriously, with gas expected to push over $4 this summer, the increase in the value of my Halliburton stock is going to barely fill the tank of my Hummer. Furthermore, I doubt Mr. Obama has priced quality top hats or monocles lately. With the madam scandal taking out some of the best professionals in the Washington D.C., some of my lobbyist friends have had to go as far as Baltimore to find quality sex at affordable prices.

An alternate plan by John Edwards to increase taxes on the wealthiest Americans would destroy the ability of the bottom 25% of the top 4% of the richest people from being able to buy and sell congress. Some may have to get by with only one yacht. This just goes to show how short sighted Mr. Edwards truly is. There’s more than one ocean.

Dr. Ryan Maynard, Editor, Newsblog 5000

What Obama needs to win the election: '

Just leave off Barrack and add an apostrophe. A weird sounding terrorist name now becomes a palletable Irish name.

O'Bama For President

I don't believe you really own a Hummer. At least I hope that you don't.
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