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Putin Compliments Vice President Cheney

Thursday, May 11, 2006

(SNN Washington) Today, Vladimir Putin complimented Vice President Dick Cheney by saying that Cheney was a wolf that that "eats and listens to no one."

This was actually a three tiered compliment. The first piece is calling Dick Cheney a wolf. A wolf is "a man given to paying unwanted sexual attention to women." This is an unbelievable compliment to a Cheney, whose virility is often questioned due to his weak physical condition and marriage to a lesbian.

The Second tier of the compliment is that Cheney, "The Wolf", eats no one. It is refreshing to see that President Putin had not given into the rumors that Vice President Cheney is a cannibal. The fact is that Vice President Cheney rarely eats anyone anymore. It is now UN ambassador John Bolton that has a problem in this area. Last Week, Bolton consumed the Permanent Representative of Malta while arguing in favor of a British-French draft resolution on Iran.

Finally, President Putin says that The Wolf (or El Lobo for our Spanish speaking readers) listens to no one. With this, Putin is giving Cheney the ultimate compliment. Cheney is a man that prides himself on not listening to anyone. Despite the orders of his Doctors, the Vice President occasionally throws away his food and eats table salt.