NewsBlog 5000
The finger on the invisible hand
 

Canada Charges Terror Suspects

Sunday, June 04, 2006

A Mountie poses with his partner in front of a large Canadian phalus.

(SNN Toronto) Police have charged twelve adults and five youths with planning an "al-Queda inspired" attack. They described that amount of bomb making materials as enough for "three Oklahomas". The Mounties would not name any of the suspected bombing targets.

Prime Minister Stephen Harper said Canada had been targeted because of its way of life. Harper added, "Today, Canada's security and intelligence measures worked. Tomorrow…" Harper finished by waggling his hand back and forth and making a "nya" sound.

Over three tons of ammonium nitrate was seized. While this material can be used to make bombs. However, the group in question was Canadian and it could be possible that they were merely going to grow a lot of pot.

Police did not want to give away too much about the religiosity and ethnicity of the alleged terrorists. However, they did release the name "Steve". So if you know someone named Steve, there is a high likelihood they are a terrorist.

Some of the members of the group were not extremists, but straight criminals doing things that would only be considered a crime in Canada, like walking against a crowd, spitting in public and selling guns for money.


Complaints:
Don't forget the most dreaded of all offenses in Canada (...) The French Canadian Anus Stretcher; they're french, that's what they do!
 
Eh, to be fair to the Frogs, don't forget the Toronto Tug Job.
 
I like Canadians because they paint their barns green and don't let them collapse nto eyesores and messes, as they do in the States. Also, they aren't full of themselves. And, they tend to be more civil. Hmmm, maybe I should reconsider my American citizenship . . .
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link